Back to work!

Hard to believe the work week is over. The vacation time was wonderful. I crossed several things off the “List of Possibilities” — including starting my thesis. Originally, I’d planned to write it (completely), but got more realistic and realized that simply starting it would be an important step.

It was a quiet week. The first few days I was alone — happily puttering, running errands, reading, sleeping, star gazing, watching movies, in-line skating, and planless. That was the most relaxing part — I had no appointments! Thursday a former work colleague stopped by for coffee and cake. Saturday I went in-line skating with a friend along the shore of Lake Constance. It was a beautiful day — sunny and breezy at the same time. Perfect! As we skated back, we heard live music in the harbor and decided to have a drink at an outdoor bar and listen for a while as we watched the sun set. It was so beautiful!

The success was: realistic expectations and absolutely no stress! Like a kid, I woke up in the morning and did what I felt like doing. By the time Monday morning rolled around, I was refreshed and eager to get back to work. Wondered what I’d missed and looked forward to seeing my colleagues again. What a great feeling!

Although it started a bit more hectically than anticipated, work has gone well this week. There were some very satisfying experiences. I am happy, satisfied and grateful. It’s the life I always wanted, and the funny thing is: It’s so simple!

The things I could do

As I wrote the title, it occurred to me that it could be a title for a Dr. Seuss book! That fits my mood. Have you ever had a day or two off, and then when it was over suddenly realized what you could have done — instead of “wasting” it? I have.

Well, I’m on vacation for a week. It started Thursday night, but since I was at a seminar all day Friday, and at another one Saturday and Sunday, it really only feels like vacation since last night.

I have two goals for this vacation week: rejuvenation and to get started on the thesis for the CE program I’m in. That’s it. Last night I watched two movies on TV: “Sense and Sensibility” and “Gilbert Grape”. In my youth I read most of Jane Austen’s books. I enjoyed both films very much, and thoughts of integrity, honesty, responsibility and clarity danced in my head until I fell asleep. The two latter terms were not new: They cropped up during meditation at the tibetan Monastery last week and have implanted themselves in my thoughts — for now.

Today I slept until noon, sat out on the sunny balcony and had some breakfast, read for a while, and wrote in my journal. Heavenly! Especially because the rose bush has several buds in various stages of blossoming. A couple of them are opening and the scent is intoxicating! Even since I got up, they have opened more.

As I sat there, it occurred to me that I could write a list of possibilities. No, not a “To Do” List — just possibilities. In case at some point I happen to be in the mood, I have suggestions at hand. Nothing dramatic — maybe buy some new shoelaces for the shoes I haven’t worn for the past 8 months, since once of the laces broke. Just puttering kind of stuff.

Like I said, rejuvenation is at the top of the list. So anything else I do will add to my happiness of being able to watch the roses develop this week, but if I accomplish nothing else, I won’t be disappointed. This vacation is simply about being.

Oh, the thesis? My expectations are realistic. If I get an outline written, that will be fine. Anything beyond that is great! See, sometimes it helps to have lower expectations of yourself! Especially on vacation! I’m free to do what I want!

End-of-vacation blues

Although I could go on like this for a while longer, tomorrow I have to go back to work — and have a 24-hour shift to get started. These past few weeks have been nice. I did some travelling, but also hung out a lot.

The other day, I thought I’d done nothing, but it occurred to me that I’d had guests, gone on day trips, puttered in the apartment, got and assembled a new sideboard, did some handiwork in the kitchen, finished the German manuscript of my book, wrote a short novel, read, wrote a few new songs, practiced guitar and relaxed. All in all, I am quite pleased.

It is wonderful to stay up as late as I want, to sleep late, to go at my own pace. It was healing, and now I feel more grounded and settled in the apartment. This was the first vacation in my new home — and it is so nice to have a home that I like to be in! That is still such a novelty. I love coming home! I love being here!

The other day I even picked up my bike from the house — the one I swore I’d never ride again since that accident a year ago. Figured I might as well get off my high horse and use it. I don’t have the money to be proud and buy a new — cheaper — bike out of spite. Anyway, it really is a nice bike. Today I took my first spin. They say, when you have an accident, you should drive/ride again as soon as possible — to get over any residual fears. Funny enough, I was a bit nervous as I swung myself up on the seat. All went well. It’s nice to have a bike.

I’m sighing and don’t really feel like getting up early and going to work tomorrow, but that’s life. On the other hand, I do like my work and it enables me to live on my own. So, I’m a little down, but generally grateful — for my work, for this life. For everything!